"Twenty-two minutes late, badger ate a junction box at New Malden"

Well, it's been a fun week on South West Trains. Rather than try and write a blog on all the woes (of which there were many), I thought I'd leave it up to the fabulous and much-missed Leonard Rossiter in his incarnation as Reggie Perrin.

Excuses for train delays into Waterloo, taken from all series of Reginald Perrin:

Eleven minutes late, somebody had stolen the lines at Surbiton

Eleven minutes late, seasonal manpower shortages, Clapham Junction

Eleven minutes late, staff difficulties, Hampton Wick.   

Eleven minutes late, signal failure at Vauxhall

Eleven minutes late, derailment of container truck, Raynes Park

Eleven minutes late, staff shortages, Nine Elms 

Eleven minutes late, defective junction box, New Malden 

Eleven minutes late, overheated axle at Berrylands 

Eleven minutes late, defective axle at Wandsworth 

Seventeen minutes late, defective bogey at Earlsfield 

Seventeen minutes late, water seeping through the cables at Effingham Junction - there was a lot of Effingham and a good deal of Blindingham

Twenty two minutes late, badger ate a junction box at New Malden

Twenty two minutes late, black ice at Norbiton

Twenty two minutes late, obstacles on the line at Berrylands 

Twenty two minutes late, fed up by train delays, came by bike. Slow puncture at Peckham 

Twenty two minutes late, escaped puma, Chessington North

Need I really say anymore?!